4 Months and Counting...

That's how long (give or take) until my 30th birthday. I don't know why it bothers me so much, but it does. Maybe because I know I'm rapidly reaching... MIDDLE AGE! I had planned to look like this (that's fitness competitor Jen Hendershott by the way) but unfortunately, I'm still not where I want to be. I get so down on myself. I know I shouldn't but really, it's my own fault. I do not eat at all like I should, I do not make time for myself and I don't sleep much. I guess I think that I'll obtain my ideal body through osmosis via websites like this and this. It's time to focus on me. I won't get there by November BUT, I could be well on my way. The dream of a figure competition still looms in my heart and won't be quelled until I achieve what it is I want.