My Cup Runneth Over

Tonight I feel thankful. I had a good conversation with my brother which was a long time coming. Long story short, he and I had it out last week during the stressful time of losing a beloved family friend.

He called me tonight and I think we reached a turning point. We had a good conversation and I am very thankful for that. The last person I want to fight with is my own brother--he's the only sibling I have.

My youngest son and I just read a good night story and just as I was about to tuck him in, he reached up to hug me and surprised me by giving me a goodnight kiss; he has never given out many kisses, even when he was a very tiny child.

My oldest son has his big end-of-the-year disco dance tomorrow and I am thrilled at the idea of being a chaperone! It's been a lot of fun watching him grow over the years. He had a band concert at school the other day and I swelled with pride watching him play. The stinker even told me in a very blase manner that he made 1st chair. I told him that's a big deal and how proud I was of him.

I love the little things in life. It's not about money or what material posessions you have. Moments are what matter most and what I will always cherish. Life is good.

Dancin With Myself

This Friday marks a momentous day in my oldest son's life. It's his first-ever school dance!

It's disco-themed and I'd love for him to dress the part since he's such a ham but he wants to wear "normal" clothes. I've volunteered to chaperone and I'm very excited!

A friend of mine asked me via Facebook if I was going to be the cool mom and I had to laugh, telling her I'd definitely be the coolest.

I can't wait to post pictures and share my adventures after it's all said and done.

Annie Get Your Gun

The boys and I are almost finished with a successful run of this fun show! Tonight and tomorrow conclude 3 months worth of hard work and rehearsals; it's gone by so fast. Check out video highlights here!

A Total Loss for Words...

I found out today that a close family friend that we've known for years passed away this morning of a massive heart attack.

It's always hard to deal with death but when it's unexpected and sudden, it's a complete blow to the stomach. When my mom broke the news this afternoon, I cried and I can't stop thinking about it.

Actually, I can't stop thinking about him. The friendly and animated way he'd tell a story, the way he and my dad would laugh together... I'm remembering one of the last times we saw he and his wife. They were in from out of town and we met them and my parents for supper at Babe's.

Afterward, we all went to one of my favorite karaoke bars because they wanted to hear me sing; they were both so supportive of me when it came to my singing. I remember singing an old Juice Newton song, Break It To Me Gently and when it was over they both had tears in their eyes and they told me how proud of me they were. Thinking on it now makes me cry.

I want to call his wife and his son (who's one of my brother's best friends) to express my sympathy but I think it's too soon right now. My dad told us at supper tonight that when Jeff called to give them the news, he said, "My dad would have wanted ya'll to know right away because he loved ya'll so much."

I am so thankful to have known John and am doubly sad to know that the world is now without such a wonderful person.

From The Mouths of Babes (babes being children, that is)

My youngest child will be 7 on Friday. We were coming home from play rehearsal tonight and he says, "Friday's my birthday and I get to take cupcakes or cookies to school and then when I get home, I get to go to Grammy's; that's really lucky!" I was very touched by the sweetness in that little boy's statement, feeling lucky to be able to spend his birthday with his grandparents. I have always been very proud of the fact that I have a close family and that I have a good relationship with my parents. To see my children have the same strong bond with my parents (and our extended family) makes me feel like the luckiest person on earth.

Not Again...

I can't sleep. I was half asleep and half awake (I could hear some godawful video on MTV) and all of a sudden, my heart started racing like crazy and I felt an insane fear come over me.

Panic attack. I was suddenly terrified of one thing only: what if I miss The Rapture? I've blogged about religion once before; it was pretty much one of my first posts. One of my biggest fears is "what if I'm not really saved?". I've thought about that a lot. It even crossed my mind at the Easter church service on Sunday.

I say that I'm a Christian and that I believe in God and anytime I'm scared or hurting, I immediately pray to God for comfort. But what if I don't genuinely believe that which I profess? How do I know for certain I'll go to Heaven when I die?

I accepted Christ as my Savior as a child; I was probably 7 or 8. However, religion has always scared the heck outta me. I can remember going to church as a small child at a particular Baptist church listening to the preacher talk about hell and being damned for eternity and the end of the world.

I can't explain the fear that came over me upon hearing those particular sermons. It was then that I became a little afraid of religion. I re-dedicated my life to Christ at a church service in Bridgeport a couple of years ago. I still can't help being scared of whether or not I'm a Believer for all the wrong reasons.

It's so hard to explain and at this hour of the night, I probably shouldn't even attempt to try. I'll just pray about it and see if I can go back to sleep...

The Spare Room

For about a month or so, I've been kicking around the idea of renting a small booth at a Plano antique/craft mall near my parents' house.

I was laid off in November so I've had a considerable amount of time on my hands which has stimulated my creative juices.

Anyway, I was telling Robert today that since he has moved the computer to his office, I should really transform our former home office into an art studio, if you will, for me.

He never really gave me a yes or no--more like a grunt, "Humm." That's a yes in my book so tomorrow, I'll begin rearranging the room and organizing my supplies, making the room conducive for creating.